December 2009
50 posts
Book Count - Final 2009`
For those who might remember, I was trying to read a book a week in 2009. I got about halfway there, and sadly, this is the closest I’ve ever come to fulfilling a New Year’s resolution. Or a goal of any kind as witnessed by the horrific job I’ve done with my own LiLoWriMo, but that’s another post for another day.
Right now, I’m reading The Other Queen by Phillipa...
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Did you ever mis-write the date to something like 12/32/09 and it really freaks you out for a sec, because, whoa, what if our world really worked like that?
I'm sorry, what?
In a case that plays like a script for a quirky indie film, a 15-year-old girl faces life behind bars for allegedly teaming up with her older boyfriend to murder her mother after she showed police the girl’s diary. Tylar Witt was 14 this past June when her mother, Joanne Witt, 47, was found dead in their home in El Dorado Hills, a very upscale Northern California suburb. Prosecutors say...
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New Site!
The reason things have been kinda quiet over here is because me and my friend Erin have launched a new site called Yay, DIY! - a site dedicated to our mutual love of glue guns, knitting, cooking and general crafting. NERDS! YES!
Please visit us at www.yaydiy.com! (Tweaks to the logo forthcoming…)
And for the fellow Tumblrs, please follow us at yaydiy.tumblr.com, which will post some of...
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“Lia, I just did so much blow in the elevator shaft in the basement.”
“Dance like the photo’s not tagged, love like you’ve never been unfriended, tweet...”
– As my friend Ellis used to say, “It’s kinda true really.”
NY Mag on Keenan Thompson. →
Not that long ago, every time a Keenan-fronted sketch would come on my roommates and I would fast-forward knowing that we weren’t missing anything. If we did happen to watch, we booed and hissed our way through. I believe I may have asked “Who is he blowing to stay on the air there?” more than once. That’s not the case anymore. Though sometimes I think his impressions all...
This is probably the best thing I've read ever. →
Because it makes me feel not so pervy and yet, oh so pervy at the same time!
If there is justice.
If there is any justice in this world, I will get a book deal or GC will get a sitcom because Carson Daly has a TV show and it is seriously the worst. He looks like Skeletor, if Skeletor was trying to make us laugh by donning a pair of ping pong balls for eyes but doesn’t realize he is actually just scaring the living shit out of everyone.
The Awl Goes Pro-Bono →
For the right for everyone to bone-o who they want without fear. Buy it. Digg it. Support it.
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The View.
Last night, I had a dream in which I was being grilled by Elizabeth Hasselback on The View and she was really trying to get me to waver on my undying love and respect of Tim Tebow. Among her questions:
- Remember when Tim Tebow joined Hezbollah?
- What did you think when he got caught playing that game where they just load bodies in tanks and then tip them over and the people who don’t get...
The Situation. About Mario.
Lia: Isn't it great to know that kids like, 20 years younger than us can still play Mario Brothers?
GC: Why wouldn't they?! This is how our grandparents must have felt about checkers.
Lia: Speaking of fun, come watch Jersey Shore with me again!
GC: No.
Searching for a Word.
My ex-boyfriend got married last Saturday. While I was crying in a bar and drinking with this shady character for upwards of 10 hours, he was getting married. We were best friends for almost 9 years before we dated for three. I took a job in New York on a Tuesday, flew back to Florida that night, notified him on Wednesday and moved on Sunday about a year and a half into our relationship. Things...
“You see, in my view a writer is a writer not because she writes well and easily,...”
– Sometimes I love to hate Oprah, because seriously, how are you right all of the time. I get annoyed that you are. But sometimes, I really love to love Oprah. Especially when these little curated gems pop up exactly when you need them do. This has been a weird day. I needed this.
I just drank soy sauce.
Sometimes a lady just needs salts in liquid form.
THE BEST NEWS EVER.
Best news ever. For reasons that should be obvious.
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Gators. Sugar Bowl. Sad.
So the Gators go to the Sugar Bowl instead of the Rose Bowl. Saturday was one of those rare days where I managed to feel the full breadth of anger, sadness, optimism and disappointment all in the course of four hours, while simultaneously getting less and less steady on my feet.
When the game ended and the shot pulled in tight to Tebow with tears in his eyes (at which point I may have tried to...
Tomorrow. Gah.
“The rankings say it’s No. 1 vs. No. 2. Technically, the stakes Saturday are exactly the same for both Florida and Alabama — an SEC championship and a berth in the BCS National Championship Game.
But make no mistake: the pressure meter tilts heavily toward one sideline. For Alabama, a victory will be treasured, a loss disappointing. But for Florida, a loss Saturday will render...
Lia for the Win.
I had to - I just had to - book my holiday flights in/out of Atlantic City. I saved myself $500 from flying in/out of New York (fuck you LaGuardia) and now have the option to gamble at my leisure. (Related.) Nothing like trying to win your family good Christmas presents and get free money to pay down your debts to let you know that life is going totally fucking rad.
Whoa: Amanda Knox Found Guilty →
26 years. Wow. Don’t even know where to start.
Slowly Becoming an Old Man.
Turning 29 was the greatest thing to ever happen to me because I now have full license to:
- Drink two beers every night and tell myself its because I need to wind down.
- Buy scratch-off lottery tickets four days a week.
- Throw mini fits when someone gets in my way of watching “the game.”
I feared old age..but that’s before I knew I could get buzzed every night and piss...
Avoiding writing my presentation I'm making in 12...
And this lady also probably has one of the funniest blogs ever.
whydoihaveablog:
I’m actually becoming really resentful that there are several people within my family that do nothing with their lives and still receive praise. “(redacted) has been doing good lately.”
REALLY? YEAH? WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY GOOD? YOU MEAN HE’S NO LONGER 24, WITHOUT A JOB FOR THE PAST 4 YEARS AND HAS NOT GONE TO SCHOOL...
Here's a little something I wrote on Tiger Woods. →
More coming tomorrow, too.
Thanks NY State!
ryan: proud of you ny state senate
Lia: i only saw the online commentary - couldn't watch yet. dramatic, was my takeaway
ryan: i didn't watch any of it. just saw the final vote. wonderful.
Lia: against?
ryan: of course. thanks for protecting me from the gays, government!
Lia: lol..yes, and the sacred, sacred institution of marriage. now by a show of hands, how many of you have children by different mothers or have cheated on your current wife or any of your former wives?
ryan: wait wait wait, the bible clearly says "thou may doeth whatever thou feeleth, so long as two dicks never shall touch"
Bobby Bowden Steps Down as Head Coach of FSU. →
As much as I hate Florida State University, and the city of Tallahassee, and everyone who lives in it, even the infants, there is a soft spot in my heart for Bobby Bowden. It’s small and practically invisible. Tinier than the size of the tiniest piece of dust, just floating around in the atmosphere far above Earth…but it’s there. Good luck, sir. Maybe you can now move out of...
Dunlap arrested for drunken driving →
You know what’s awesome? When an amazing defensive end gets arrested just days before one of the biggest game of his - and his team’s - life! Way to put your team and your university in a nearly unnavigable spot, dumbass. Good thing the burdened is lessened as Alabama doesn’t have an incredible running back! Oh wait.